Monday, September 11, 2006

Caffeine Dreams

Last night I drank 16 oz. of coffee way past the cut-off mark. Consequently, I am now in a zombie-like trance of perpetual twilight.

My default state is to drink just enough coffee to where my heart is about to, but does not, asplode. I get my exercise my running to the bathroom every five minutes. It's a great health plan - you get your aerobic excercises in double-time.

But today I am in training. Lucky for me, my trainer is at a remote location, and we are all just following along on a screen, via remote desktop. Since we're interacting with our trainer via conference call, we can just put our phone on mute and then snore away. If only I could go to sleep.

Instead, the pull of the full moon is calling my name. Not only am I zombie-like, but I'm turning into a werewolf. My happy trail is already extra furry. My fingernails are either slowly turning into large talons, or else I just need to clip'm - good lawd! I still have hardly any chest hair - my dad said that spicy pasta would put hair on my chest but he lied! All lies!

I guess as long as I don't turn into Mothra, that crap-happy Godzilla reject, then it's all good.

Back to training! Until next time!

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