I'm a software developer, and every once in a while I'll get the itch to read a book about programming. But deciding which book to read is a tough choice, mainly because most of the books about programming have pictures of the authors on the cover. And although I know I shouldn't judge a book by its cover, I just can't bring myself to pay for a book that has a cover that looks like this, or this, or this.
No offense to the people on the cover of these books, but you're ugly.
Being ugly comes with the territory. If you weren't ugly you probably wouldn't have gotten into computers in the first place, you wouldn't have written your book, and countless millions would not have learned from you. Actually, I probably wouldn't trust a programming book if it had a decent-looking person on the cover either, because I'd know that person wasn't really a computer nerd.
If I wrote a programming book, my book cover would have Godzilla rampaging through the streets, punching holes in buildings and shooting flames out of his mouth. Godzilla would be wearing a name tag that states the programming language being discussed, and each building/helicopter Godzilla destroys would have the name of another programming language. The book's cover would convey the point that my programming language is awesome and may be radioactive.
At the very least I would put Godzilla on the cover along with the other guys who helped write the book, with maybe one of the guy's heads chewed off, like so:
Now be honest, if you saw this book on a shelf at Barnes and Noble, wouldn't you at least flip through it?
The Existential Terror of Battle Royale
5 weeks ago