Saturday, October 24, 2009

Indecent Exposure in Virginny

A man in Virginia was recently arrested for being naked in his own home after a woman walked by and saw him through the windows.

The woman, who was walking her 7 year-old across the guy's lawn at the time, called the cops on the guy after not being able to work the camera app on her iPhone.

Sources close to the case, who asked to be kept anonymous and/or we forgot to ask them their names, said that the guy was home alone and was making coffee. Apparently he was also trying to determine what to eat for breakfast, but was having trouble deciding between a sausage, a banana, or possibly having a leftover hot dog for an early lunch.

As a man who's been known to run around the house (and other people's houses) naked once or twice, I defend this poor Virginny man. In fact, I think the woman should be arrested on two counts: first for being a peeping tom, and second for trespassing on the guy's property - the article clearly says that the woman was walking her child across the man's lawn. If this had happened in Texas I bet the woman would have been tasered.

Arresting a man for being naked in his own home is ridiculous. It's not like he was pressing his nads up against the window - he was making coffee. And he was probably rubbing his balls and crack on his roommate's food, as is his God-given right.

Who are we to police a man minding his own business in his own home? This is America, after all. If we can't be naked in our own homes, then where can we be naked?

And since your car is an extension of your home, I argue that you should be allowed to drive around naked any time you want. Just don't forget which stick to shift when you're out there on the Interstate, otherwise someone's going to call the cops on you.

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