I might be unwittingly teaching my child to be a cannibal.
When Anne laughs or coos, I can't help myself but to grab her and flip her so she can't escape, then tell her, "I'm going to eat you up!" Then I inevitably gnaw on a foot or arm, followed by her neck. This makes Anne giggle and coo some more, which then makes me gnaw on her toes.
It's a vicious cycle.
Anne doesn't seem to mind this at all. In fact, if I stop for even a second, she'll try to jam her foot into my mouth while she continually repeats her favorite mantra: "More... more... more...."
The Greek god Cronos ate his young. Cronos was the father of Zeus, Hades, Poseidon and Hera, and according to Greek myth Cronos ate his children - all except for Zeus. But instead of being a blatant baby-killer, I like to think that he was just nibbling on his children's feet because they were so cute, and he just got carried away.
It's easy to see how that could happen. Take our Thanksgiving meal at my wife's cousin's house: Anne was playing with her cousin David, and they were so cute together that I just couldn't help but to pick them both up and zerbert their stomachs.
And before I knew it, I was having a second Thanksgiving feast.
Hacker, Hack Thyself
2 months ago