It's been almost a week since my last blog, and that's because I haven't been able to sit down in front of my computer in order to write anything.
Because I haven't been able to sit.
My last blog post, about going to the USS Kidd, had a picture of the Mississippi Bridge in the cross hairs of one of the Kidd's guns. I took the picture and posted it to my blog, but I did not - I repeat, did NOT - point the gun at the bridge. The gun was already pointed there. All I did was take a picture.
And for that, I had a visit with a guy named Bubba, who was not very gentle with the rubber gloves.
I saw him approach my car right as I parked at Walmart. He was in all black, with dark eyeglasses and even had on an earpiece. I didn't resist when he grabbed me, because to be honest, I was kind of expecting it. I thought the Department of Homeland Defense would send me an angry letter, but didn't think it would come to this.
After an hour of interrogation and then fifteen minutes - although it felt like a few days - of a full body search, I was free to go.
It turns out that "Bubba" was not from the Department of Homeland Defense. He's just some guy with bad vision and poor hearing that was lost and confused in our local Walmart parking lot, and when he saw me he had a flashback to when he was a proctologist in Gonzales, and decided to give me a free screening.
So the bad news: I still can't sit down for very long, and I lost a week's worth of blogging. But the good news: Apparently my colon looks great.
The Existential Terror of Battle Royale
5 weeks ago