I've joined a Fantasy Football league on Yahoo. It's my first time playing so I'm not really sure what the rules are or what I have to do to play. There's a helpful tutorial on Yahoo's website but I don't feel like reading it.
Instead, I just drafted Saints and former LSU players. I think I'm golden.
I originally thought Fantasy Football involved orcs, elves and dragons, as that's what all of the fantasy books I've read involve. Then I thought it was similar to the lingerie league, which actually has a football team called the Orlando Fantasy.
But when I figured out it was regular football, I was excited. I've been listening to Sirius NFL Radio for the better part of a year, so that makes me a football expert.
We had our draft on Sunday. My team's name is The Tantrum. Here are my players:
Drew Brees (NO-QB)
Robert Meachem (NO-WR)
Devery Henderson (NO-WR)
Early Doucet (ARI-WR) - former LSU player
Reggie Bush (NO-RB)
Darren McFadden (Oak-RB)
Jeremy Shockey (NO-TE)
Sebastian Janikowski (Oak-K)
Tracy Porter (NO-CB)
David Akers (Phi-K)
Randall Gay (NO-CB)
Darren Sproles (SD-RB)
Damian Willians (Ten-WR)
I picked Janikowski and McFadden because I figured Oakland probably will try for more field goals than touchdowns this year, and because they have a new QB they will probably run the ball often.
I picked Darren Sproles because he stutters (like me), and he was the Stuttering Foundation spokesperson last year. To stutter and yet get up in front of the media and talk, well, that seems pretty fearless to me. (That's also why James Earl Jones is one of my favorite actors. He stuttered as a child, but went onto becoming the voice of Darth Vader, one of the most recognizable voices ever.)
And I picked Drew Brees because HE'S FRICKIN' DREW BREES. I had the seventh round pick and I still got Brees. I don't know how I lucked out.
And finally, I picked Reggie Bush because he's a great all around player, and because he banged Kim Kardashian and maybe he'll send me some hot pictures if I tell him he's on my fantasy team.
My first match is against my cousin Jeremy, whose team name is named Flo-Rida. I've got lots of Saints on my team, and Jeremy has Minnesota as his fantasy team's defense. And the Saints play Minnesota on Thursday.
Plus I have a bookshelf full of orcs, elves and dragons, and am not ashamed of it. So I think I have the upper hand in this fantasy football thingy.
Bring it on!
Hacker, Hack Thyself
3 weeks ago