I was doing my daily scan of the Huffington Post while on my favorite ride when I came across an article titled Heart-Shaped Pizza & Other Terrible Valentine's Day Gifts.
And I have to say, I was a little offended, because Betty actually gave me a heart-shaped pizza for Valentine's Day. Here's the proof:
Pizza is my favorite food. And if you prepare your pizza with a low-fat cheese, pizza can actually be pretty good for you. If you think about it, pizza has all the food groups: Dairy (cheese), meats / proteins (pepperoni), grains and wheat (crust), and fruits and vegetables (tomato sauce + toppings). It's a wonder-food!
And so it was special to me that my most favorite person in the whole world gave me my most favorite food. Can there be a better Valentine gift than that?
But wait, there's more. That wasn't all that was offensive about that Huffington Post article. The article also said that Fundies were a terrible gift.
Now I had never heard about Fundies at the time, but basically, Fundies are underwear that two people can wear at the same time. And for the life of me, I can't figure out why this is a terrible gift idea. The only thing that I can think of that is a better gift than Fundies is for two people to not be wearing any underwear at all!
The article goes onto say that mock magazine covers are a bad gift. But I got one for Betty for Mother's Day where she's on the cover of Parenting Magazine, and she claims to like it. Now I have my doubts.
The Huffington Post thinks that a Pajamagram is a terrible Valentine's Day idea. But when Betty and I saw that, our heads turned towards each other, our eyes locked, and now it's a race to see who can get one for the other person the fastest.
Candy bras and edible underwear are also apparently bad Valentine's Day gifts. Well I'm here to tell the Huffington Post that any underwear is edible if you want it bad enough.
Basically, Betty and I have given each other the cheesiest gifts imaginable, and yet we've loved them. So... take that, Huffington Post!
(Also, thanks for "exposing" me to Fundies! I know what I'm getting Betty for Valentine's Day next year!)
Hacker, Hack Thyself
4 months ago