Monday, April 18, 2011

The Ultimate Pizza

At some point in my life I will open a pizzeria. I already have a grand idea for the Gradient Pizza (TM) where the crust starts out thin on one side but slowly gets thicker as you move across the pizza.

But while my family and I were eating at the California Pizza Kitchen in Perkin's Rowe today, I had an epiphany:

I didn't want pepperoni to top my pizza. I didn't want extra cheese or sausage or BBQ chicken. I didn't want vegetables, pineapples or bacon.

I wanted more pizza.

Thus, the idea for the Ultimate Pizza was born. The Ultimate Pizza is a pizza topped with another pizza.

In my restaurant, if you want a pepperoni pizza as the topping of your pizza, then you'd order a pepperoni pizza pizza. We'd bake a pepperoni pizza, chop it up into bits, then bake it into another pizza.

You can even have more than one pizza baked into your pizza. The Gradient Pizza would go well topped on top of another Gradient Pizza.

It's brilliant. And tasty. And Ultimate.

And don't think I'm down and out by using the name Ultimate Pizza. If I think of another great pizza idea that is ultimate in nature, I'll name it the Penultimate Pizza.

You hear me, California Pizza Kitchen? I'm talking to you! I'm coming after you with my Ultimate and Gradient Pizzas, and there's nothing that you can do to stop me! Bwahaha!

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