Friday, July 29, 2011

vInyl: The Portable Vinyl Record Player

I felt old today, but also had a brilliant idea based on my old fartiness.

One of Betty's cousins bought a new iPod Touch case that looks like a cassette tape. But she was born after the death of cassettes, and has never listened to anything on tape. In fact, she's never even had to buy CDs! All she knows is digital music.

(Here's a link to a picture of a cassette tape, for all you whipper-snappers too young to know what I'm talking about.

In a moment of "wow I'm old" I tried to explain how iPods are the new version of Walkmans, when all of a sudden she said this:

"A What-man?"

Seriously.

"Walkman!" I exclaimed. (See the exclamation point? That means I exclaimed it!) "You know, you could take music with you while you walked around. It was amazing!"

She just looked at me like I'm an idiot. (I know, I know, score one point for her.) She's always been able to do this. What's the big deal?

"Well," I said, "before MP3s you could buy CDs, and you could listen to them in Walkmans or other portable CD players. And before that you could listen to tapes on other types of Walkmans. And before that...."

And that's where I stopped. There was no portable music before that.

That's the end of my story about me feeling old. Now here's where I come up with a brilliant idea.

Music lovers will tell you that music sounds better on vinyl records than on anything else, even MP3s. But there was no way to carry around vinyl records and listen to them on the fly.

UNTIL NOW!

Introducing, the vInyl!

[Picture: The vInyl!]

By the way, I totally stole the picture of that guy holding his arm up in the air from this website. My apologies to that company for forever tainting their mascot. And I took the picture of a phonograph from Wikipedia. And all those white pixels between the phonograph and the guy means that I badly photoshopped this picture. But you get the point.

I named my new invention the vInyl. The "I" in vInyl is uppercase, and everything else is lowercase. It's sort of like an inverse of iPod, iPhone, iPood, etc.

Time to crank out your parents' old records and show the world how hip you are, vInyl-style!

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