I either have a broken rib, or I am a huge wuss.
Of course, it may be that I've pulled a muscle in my rib cage. More likely, I've crushed some of the cartilage between two of my ribs. Even more likely, I'm a humongous vagina.
Two nights ago the whole family was in mine and Betty's room. Peter was watching video clips of Elmo on the computer, because he's a Sesame Street-loving computer savant. Betty was supervising him while doing ten thousand other things, because she is the ultimate multi-tasker. (She's already done twenty things while I've written this blog post.) Annie and I were laying on the bed, watching TV. And we did so as all kids watch TV: laying our on bellies, with our heads in our hands.
I'm apparently no longer even close to being a kid anymore, though.
I might have wanted to make a funny statement, or maybe just get up off the bed. I don't remember, as the pain upon moving was so severe that all other thoughts left my head. But as soon as I turned my torso around ever so slightly, I heard a loud CRACK!
And then the blinding pain came.
It hurt so bad, but was also so funny that I'm apparently so old and out of shape that watching TV is now an at-risk activity for me, that I couldn't help but laugh. But laughing just made the pain worse.
Seriously, I think one of my ribs is cracked. It hurts to breathe.
My ribs feel fine after a couple Tylenol. And my ribs were fine all day at work. But after a while the pain medication wears off, and I'm once again reminded about how much of a girly man I am every time that I breathe, raise my arm ever so gently, or cough.
If you have ever broken a rib, damaged cartilage between your ribs, or maybe are a doctor that specializes in internal medicine, I'd value your opinion as a comment to this post.
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