Thursday, June 15, 2006

Buster Dog!

My neighbors have a weiner dog named Buster. Buster's a pretty friendly dog. His only flaw, if I can call it a flaw, is that when he gets really excited, he pees all over the place.

And I'm not talking about a puddle of pee. I'm talking about an arc of high-velocity streaming dog whiz.

The first couple of times I pet Buster, he got me in the leg. After that I learned to pet him from the side. He doesn't pee as much, except when he gets overly excited.

Enter: Steve.

One day when I was talking to my neighbor Mike (who I've mistakenly been calling Steve for the past two years), Buster broke free of his confining chain and obtained a brief glimmer of freedom. Instead of running into the street to chase cars or sell crack, he decided to run straight to me and start humping my leg.

I picked Buster up, hoping to keep him out of harm's way until his parents came to pick him up. Upon being picked up, Buster got a little "excited." The dog's owner, Penny, and Penny's 4-year-old daughter Kayla, came to get Buster.

Kayla blurted out, "Buster's a bad dog!" Steve (er... Mike), being a gentleman and honorable citizen, responded with, "And he's HORNY, too!"

I, being shocked that a grown man would say something like that in front of a 4-year-old, turned to face Steve. When I turned, Buster turned with me. A peed right in Steve's face.

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